Meditating with your Child – A Practice Based on Our ‘Ten’ Sense
Sarah Wood Vallely, CNE Magazine, April, 2006
Aristotle defined the five senses we all understand today. Our five senses are smell, hearing, taste, sight and touch. These senses allow us the witness beauty, help us learn new things and let us know what is happening in our environment. They also play an important role in meditation and other inward focused activities such as yoga. Relying on our senses during meditation helps us find our focus and adds an element of excitement. I call this sensational meditation. This practice is as easy as listening to a soothing bell sound or imagining a tree in your mind, making it a perfect practice for both adults and children.
Our senses helps us settle into the present moment, whether we are involved in a conversation, driving or meditating. I like to refer to this state of mind as being in the here and now. When we a practice this kind of meditation, we are trying our best not to drift off into thoughts about the past or future, and stay focused on what is happening right now. Thoughts about our shopping list or the parking ticket we received yesterday bring us out of the here and now. We are also trying to avoid thoughts about people and things in other places (not here). Notions of our child in the other room or fantasizing about the beautiful weather in another state take us away from here. There are many proven benefits for practicing this mindfulness meditation, such as improved academic skills, lower blood pressure and decreased anxiety.
To help stop thinking about other things and other places, we can listen to, touch and even look at what is happening right here, right now. Some meditation practices require meditators to keep their eyes open during meditation for this purpose. These meditators hold their eyes gently open and look at the floor in front of them. Looking here occupies their vision so they become less distracted by mind-invented images of people, places and things.
Using our sense of hearing also helps us avoid thoughts that bring us out of the here and now. Next time you meditate, listen, is there a fan blowing? Is there a clock ticking? Focusing on these sounds help us turn off the inner voice that brings up the past and future.
Our sense of touch is one more sense that helps us stay in the here and now. Next time you meditate, feel your body resting on the floor or where ever you are sitting or laying down. Feel your heart beat. Notice any pains in your body or tight muscles. Ironically, sometimes, I am grateful for pain because it gives me something to focus on during meditation.
Taste and smell can also keep us present. During meditation, notice what you smell. Can you pick up a scent of essential oil on your wrist? Can you smell dinner cooking? Can you taste anything – bitter, sweet, sour? Although, I do not use my sense of taste and smell to bring me into the here and now as often as my other senses, sometimes I find them helpful.
Children easily use their five senses to practice focus and enjoy tranquility. Eight-year-old Nyah sometimes feels uneasy about her classmates and school assignments. Nyah’s school counselor teaches her a meditation technique that helps Nyah find her own sense of inner peace during these moments. In meditation, Nyah feels her heart beat, listens to silence broken by the pitter-patter of feet. Then she notices that the back of her eye lids look like the night sky sparkling with stars. She breathes deeply to smell the citrus airfreshner that lingers in her counselor’s office. Nyah takes a juicy raspberry from her lunch bag. She willingly places in her mouth, taking her time to taste the tang and the sweetness it offers. This meditation helps Nyah calm her nerves and prepare her for her next challenge.
Our Five Additional ‘Inner’ Senses
Now our discussion will exceed Aristotle’s basic categorization of our senses, leading us into the further complexity of ourselves as sensational beings. I taste my aunt’s blueberry pie and its delicate sweetness brings me joy, but what if I close my eyes and imagine having a bite of my Aunt’s pie instead? Would I taste it? Would I feel joy from its deliciousness? What if I heard a drum roll in my mind before I stood up to speak at a business meeting? What if I closed my eyes and saw bright light swirling around me? Am I having a sensational experience even though these events do not occur in my outer world?
I would say so. Not only do we experience smells, sounds, tastes, images and feelings around us, we also have these experiences during meditation or other inward activities. In a dream I see red mountains and feel the rocky earth at my feet. I hear the hooves of a hundred horses. Once, I had a lucid dream (I knew I was dreaming). The scientist in me took advantage of this conscious experience. I touched the table and felt the smooth surface of the wood. I touched the wall and felt the little bumps left by the paintbrush. I thought to myself, “I’m dreaming, yet I can feel these surfaces as if they are purely real.” Although dreaming is different than meditating, the awareness of inner senses during these states of consciousness are similar.
When I talk to children about their ability to see pictures in their minds and hear an inner voice, they usually offer imagination as the explanation. Imagination refers to perception of images, sounds, etc. when there is no stimulation of the sense receptors from the outer world - in other words when we experience smells, sounds, tastes, images and feelings that are not picked up by Aristotle’s five senses, possibly during meditation or other inwardly focused activities. Young children have robust imaginations, but few adults nurture theirs. Sadly, many adults eventually forget how to experience inner worlds with their inner senses. In fact, according to William Tedford of Oberlin College, at around six, children begin to lose this ability and replace it with abstract reasoning (Footnote 1). But this loss of imaginative ability is not necessary, is not inevitable or irreversible.
I like to think that we have ten senses: five senses that allow us to perceive and experience the outer world and five additional senses that allow us to perceive and experience our inner world (or nonphysical world), and no single sense or set of senses is more important than another. While our outer senses help us to thrive in our physical world, our inner senses are equally important for our growth and adjustment. These senses help us heal our minds, bodies and spirits and help us better understand ourselves because they are a bridge to our mental, emotional and spiritual worlds.
Although I have used the word imagination to explain our five inner senses, I do not mean to belittle a child’s meditation experience by saying, “Oh that’s just their imagination.” Imagination is the portal to higher realms of consciousness. Imagination is bigger and more important than most adults realize. Saying to a child, “It’s just your imagination,” is like telling Albert Einstein, “Oh stop wasting your time thinking about light traveling through space - that’s just your imagination.” Imagination opens up not only worlds denied by most adults but also enables us to be creative in our daily lives.
Our five additional inner senses play an important role during journey meditations. During journey meditations we travel in our minds to wondrous places that seem far away but in fact are a part of us. They are a reflection of our inner being. We might be led by someone or lead our own experience. We might imagine we are on a beach. We imagine feeling the warm sun on our skin and the sound of waves while we visualize seagulls glide by. This imaginative experience helps us tap into the gentle soothing part of us that sometimes gets lost among the chaos and drama of life. During another journey, we might focus on a body pain, which leads us to hear and visualize a drum being played – a subconscious expression of the throbbing pain. Then we might summon an imaginary violin to play and soothe the pounding drum (our pain). These experiences are made possible by our ability to invoke our inner senses of sight, hearing and touch.
Children love to use their five inner senses during journey meditation. I lead Twelve-year-old Nathan through a journey in a time machine. During this experience he is thrilled to see the buttons and dials inside his spaceship-like time machine. Then he feels the machine start up with a jolt, followed by a steady vibration. When he arrives at his destination, he gets out of the machine to feel the gritty ground beneath his feet. He hears the zoom of a plane overhead and sees a cityscape filled with shiny colorful buildings. Nathan has engaged his five inner senses to help him fully experience his meditation. This meditation is hands down my students favorite and it gives my students the skills they need to enjoy other journey meditations that help them overcome challenges and heal emotionally.
Full Sensational Experience
I’ve discussed how to use our five outer senses (Aristotle’s) and our five inner senses during meditation. Now, let us bring all ten senses together to enjoy a grand finale and what I call, the full sensational experience. This dramatic ending is far from exceptional. We experience our everyday life with all ten senses. We walk down the street and see the sun cast shadows on the ground; we hear the sound of a truck passing by; we feel a hunger pang in our stomach (outer senses). We feel a tinge of excitement somewhere – a place we can’t quite pinpoint (inner). We might also remember the way our child smells, hear our inner voice sing our favorite melody and then imagine how our dinner will taste (more inner senses). We are having a full sensational experience.
Why not meditate using all ten senses as well. Sometimes I meditate sitting on my back porch. I listen to crickets peep in the yard. I visualize a ball of light above my head. My ball of light grows and I feel a warm energy fill my body. I smell the autumn air, while I hear myself silently repeat a mantra. I feel the breeze brush against my face and I am at peace. One of the best meditations we can practice, is to simple be and notice our ten senses soak up our physical and nonphysical worlds.
Children can notice what comes through their ten sensory channels during meditation as well. Five-year-old Jess’s father helps Jess fall asleep. Jess uses her outer senses to feel her muscles in her legs and arms relax. She also notices how itchy her tired eyes feel. She exercises her inner senses by picturing a soft puffy purple cloud float above her. She listens peacefully to her imaginary cloud play her favorite lullaby, which helps her relax even more. Jess’s senses help her drift into comfortable sleep. Although the meditation Jess’s father leads her through is intentionally written to help children use both their inner and outer senses, all meditations can be full sensational experiences if we choose to experience them this way.
The following exercise will help you practice using all ten of your senses. After you experience them for yourself, lead your child through a similar meditation, using terminology that your child will enjoy and understand.
Wherever you are, whatever you’re doing, stop. Breathe deeply and close your eyes. When your eyes are closed, your senses of hearing, touch, smell and taste increase. Listen to your outer environment. Take a deep breath. Any scents in the air? Feel your hands. Are they smooth or rough? Are you tasting something right now? Go inward and focus on your being. Are you experiencing any emotions? If not, play with an emotion. Pretend you are feeling that emotion. Can you hear anything that is not in your outer world — maybe a song or someone’s voice. Take your time. See your favorite pie under your nose. Can you smell it? Take a bite of your imaginary pie. Can you taste it? Now don’t imagine anything in particular. See what happens. Be an observer of your own experience. Notice what you see, hear, feel (including emotions), taste and smell whether it is in your outer or inner environment.
You might notice that some parts of this exercise were easier for you to do than others. Even becoming aware of a couple inner senses in a single meditation is highly beneficial.
A Mirror is as Clear as it is Polished
Before I became a meditation teacher I worked as an art teacher in both elementary and high school. I explained to my students that creating representational art is not so much about moving the medium across the paper to draw or paint, but instead it concerns our sight – our ability to see what we are depicting — seeing its contour and the negative space between and around the object. I encouraged my students to stop drawing or painting for a moment and look. I asked them to experience the still life visually as fully as possible. By this same token, possibly the most liberating meditation we can do is to stop and listen or to stop and feel.
Moreover, some people who believe they cannot meditate are often trying to perceive something in their meditation with a sensory channel that is difficult for them to use. This channel might not be used regularly or at all, and therefore it simply doesn’t work as well. I had an adult meditation student a few years ago, Charlie, who said he had tried to meditate unsuccessfully for years. During class, I led him through a meditation in which he was encouraged to feel what he was experiencing in addition to seeing and hearing it. Afterwards, Charlie was moved tremendously. He told the class he felt warmth in his chest when he was guided to move energy from the top of his head down to his tailbone. Charlie said he felt tingling in other areas of his body and then settled into a sense of clarity he had never experienced before. It became apparent to him that his sense of inner feeling was alive and strong and that in fact he could meditate. Feeling through his meditations is a wonderful place for Charlie to start his practice. Eventually, his other inner senses will be rejuvenated with a little practice.
When we perceive our world fully through the mechanics of our senses during meditation or during waking life, our reality is as clear as our inner and outer senses are able to smell, hear, taste, see and feel it — and so we endeavor to do so fully. During meditation, expanding our senses heightens our meditation and our benefit from it. These senses that so many of us tend to neglect, relegate to “just” imagination or tune out all together, are essential to our meditation experience. So let us nurture our senses in ourselves and in our children — in order to enhance our meditative experience but to also improve our daily lives by having a fuller sensational experience at all times.
(Footnote 1)The Encyclopedia American International Edition, copyright 2001, Grolier Incorporated. Danbury, Connecticut. Volume 14, page 797.
Our senses helps us settle into the present moment, whether we are involved in a conversation, driving or meditating. I like to refer to this state of mind as being in the here and now. When we a practice this kind of meditation, we are trying our best not to drift off into thoughts about the past or future, and stay focused on what is happening right now. Thoughts about our shopping list or the parking ticket we received yesterday bring us out of the here and now. We are also trying to avoid thoughts about people and things in other places (not here). Notions of our child in the other room or fantasizing about the beautiful weather in another state take us away from here. There are many proven benefits for practicing this mindfulness meditation, such as improved academic skills, lower blood pressure and decreased anxiety.
To help stop thinking about other things and other places, we can listen to, touch and even look at what is happening right here, right now. Some meditation practices require meditators to keep their eyes open during meditation for this purpose. These meditators hold their eyes gently open and look at the floor in front of them. Looking here occupies their vision so they become less distracted by mind-invented images of people, places and things.
Using our sense of hearing also helps us avoid thoughts that bring us out of the here and now. Next time you meditate, listen, is there a fan blowing? Is there a clock ticking? Focusing on these sounds help us turn off the inner voice that brings up the past and future.
Our sense of touch is one more sense that helps us stay in the here and now. Next time you meditate, feel your body resting on the floor or where ever you are sitting or laying down. Feel your heart beat. Notice any pains in your body or tight muscles. Ironically, sometimes, I am grateful for pain because it gives me something to focus on during meditation.
Taste and smell can also keep us present. During meditation, notice what you smell. Can you pick up a scent of essential oil on your wrist? Can you smell dinner cooking? Can you taste anything – bitter, sweet, sour? Although, I do not use my sense of taste and smell to bring me into the here and now as often as my other senses, sometimes I find them helpful.
Children easily use their five senses to practice focus and enjoy tranquility. Eight-year-old Nyah sometimes feels uneasy about her classmates and school assignments. Nyah’s school counselor teaches her a meditation technique that helps Nyah find her own sense of inner peace during these moments. In meditation, Nyah feels her heart beat, listens to silence broken by the pitter-patter of feet. Then she notices that the back of her eye lids look like the night sky sparkling with stars. She breathes deeply to smell the citrus airfreshner that lingers in her counselor’s office. Nyah takes a juicy raspberry from her lunch bag. She willingly places in her mouth, taking her time to taste the tang and the sweetness it offers. This meditation helps Nyah calm her nerves and prepare her for her next challenge.
Our Five Additional ‘Inner’ Senses
Now our discussion will exceed Aristotle’s basic categorization of our senses, leading us into the further complexity of ourselves as sensational beings. I taste my aunt’s blueberry pie and its delicate sweetness brings me joy, but what if I close my eyes and imagine having a bite of my Aunt’s pie instead? Would I taste it? Would I feel joy from its deliciousness? What if I heard a drum roll in my mind before I stood up to speak at a business meeting? What if I closed my eyes and saw bright light swirling around me? Am I having a sensational experience even though these events do not occur in my outer world?
I would say so. Not only do we experience smells, sounds, tastes, images and feelings around us, we also have these experiences during meditation or other inward activities. In a dream I see red mountains and feel the rocky earth at my feet. I hear the hooves of a hundred horses. Once, I had a lucid dream (I knew I was dreaming). The scientist in me took advantage of this conscious experience. I touched the table and felt the smooth surface of the wood. I touched the wall and felt the little bumps left by the paintbrush. I thought to myself, “I’m dreaming, yet I can feel these surfaces as if they are purely real.” Although dreaming is different than meditating, the awareness of inner senses during these states of consciousness are similar.
When I talk to children about their ability to see pictures in their minds and hear an inner voice, they usually offer imagination as the explanation. Imagination refers to perception of images, sounds, etc. when there is no stimulation of the sense receptors from the outer world - in other words when we experience smells, sounds, tastes, images and feelings that are not picked up by Aristotle’s five senses, possibly during meditation or other inwardly focused activities. Young children have robust imaginations, but few adults nurture theirs. Sadly, many adults eventually forget how to experience inner worlds with their inner senses. In fact, according to William Tedford of Oberlin College, at around six, children begin to lose this ability and replace it with abstract reasoning (Footnote 1). But this loss of imaginative ability is not necessary, is not inevitable or irreversible.
I like to think that we have ten senses: five senses that allow us to perceive and experience the outer world and five additional senses that allow us to perceive and experience our inner world (or nonphysical world), and no single sense or set of senses is more important than another. While our outer senses help us to thrive in our physical world, our inner senses are equally important for our growth and adjustment. These senses help us heal our minds, bodies and spirits and help us better understand ourselves because they are a bridge to our mental, emotional and spiritual worlds.
Although I have used the word imagination to explain our five inner senses, I do not mean to belittle a child’s meditation experience by saying, “Oh that’s just their imagination.” Imagination is the portal to higher realms of consciousness. Imagination is bigger and more important than most adults realize. Saying to a child, “It’s just your imagination,” is like telling Albert Einstein, “Oh stop wasting your time thinking about light traveling through space - that’s just your imagination.” Imagination opens up not only worlds denied by most adults but also enables us to be creative in our daily lives.
Our five additional inner senses play an important role during journey meditations. During journey meditations we travel in our minds to wondrous places that seem far away but in fact are a part of us. They are a reflection of our inner being. We might be led by someone or lead our own experience. We might imagine we are on a beach. We imagine feeling the warm sun on our skin and the sound of waves while we visualize seagulls glide by. This imaginative experience helps us tap into the gentle soothing part of us that sometimes gets lost among the chaos and drama of life. During another journey, we might focus on a body pain, which leads us to hear and visualize a drum being played – a subconscious expression of the throbbing pain. Then we might summon an imaginary violin to play and soothe the pounding drum (our pain). These experiences are made possible by our ability to invoke our inner senses of sight, hearing and touch.
Children love to use their five inner senses during journey meditation. I lead Twelve-year-old Nathan through a journey in a time machine. During this experience he is thrilled to see the buttons and dials inside his spaceship-like time machine. Then he feels the machine start up with a jolt, followed by a steady vibration. When he arrives at his destination, he gets out of the machine to feel the gritty ground beneath his feet. He hears the zoom of a plane overhead and sees a cityscape filled with shiny colorful buildings. Nathan has engaged his five inner senses to help him fully experience his meditation. This meditation is hands down my students favorite and it gives my students the skills they need to enjoy other journey meditations that help them overcome challenges and heal emotionally.
Full Sensational Experience
I’ve discussed how to use our five outer senses (Aristotle’s) and our five inner senses during meditation. Now, let us bring all ten senses together to enjoy a grand finale and what I call, the full sensational experience. This dramatic ending is far from exceptional. We experience our everyday life with all ten senses. We walk down the street and see the sun cast shadows on the ground; we hear the sound of a truck passing by; we feel a hunger pang in our stomach (outer senses). We feel a tinge of excitement somewhere – a place we can’t quite pinpoint (inner). We might also remember the way our child smells, hear our inner voice sing our favorite melody and then imagine how our dinner will taste (more inner senses). We are having a full sensational experience.
Why not meditate using all ten senses as well. Sometimes I meditate sitting on my back porch. I listen to crickets peep in the yard. I visualize a ball of light above my head. My ball of light grows and I feel a warm energy fill my body. I smell the autumn air, while I hear myself silently repeat a mantra. I feel the breeze brush against my face and I am at peace. One of the best meditations we can practice, is to simple be and notice our ten senses soak up our physical and nonphysical worlds.
Children can notice what comes through their ten sensory channels during meditation as well. Five-year-old Jess’s father helps Jess fall asleep. Jess uses her outer senses to feel her muscles in her legs and arms relax. She also notices how itchy her tired eyes feel. She exercises her inner senses by picturing a soft puffy purple cloud float above her. She listens peacefully to her imaginary cloud play her favorite lullaby, which helps her relax even more. Jess’s senses help her drift into comfortable sleep. Although the meditation Jess’s father leads her through is intentionally written to help children use both their inner and outer senses, all meditations can be full sensational experiences if we choose to experience them this way.
The following exercise will help you practice using all ten of your senses. After you experience them for yourself, lead your child through a similar meditation, using terminology that your child will enjoy and understand.
Wherever you are, whatever you’re doing, stop. Breathe deeply and close your eyes. When your eyes are closed, your senses of hearing, touch, smell and taste increase. Listen to your outer environment. Take a deep breath. Any scents in the air? Feel your hands. Are they smooth or rough? Are you tasting something right now? Go inward and focus on your being. Are you experiencing any emotions? If not, play with an emotion. Pretend you are feeling that emotion. Can you hear anything that is not in your outer world — maybe a song or someone’s voice. Take your time. See your favorite pie under your nose. Can you smell it? Take a bite of your imaginary pie. Can you taste it? Now don’t imagine anything in particular. See what happens. Be an observer of your own experience. Notice what you see, hear, feel (including emotions), taste and smell whether it is in your outer or inner environment.
You might notice that some parts of this exercise were easier for you to do than others. Even becoming aware of a couple inner senses in a single meditation is highly beneficial.
A Mirror is as Clear as it is Polished
Before I became a meditation teacher I worked as an art teacher in both elementary and high school. I explained to my students that creating representational art is not so much about moving the medium across the paper to draw or paint, but instead it concerns our sight – our ability to see what we are depicting — seeing its contour and the negative space between and around the object. I encouraged my students to stop drawing or painting for a moment and look. I asked them to experience the still life visually as fully as possible. By this same token, possibly the most liberating meditation we can do is to stop and listen or to stop and feel.
Moreover, some people who believe they cannot meditate are often trying to perceive something in their meditation with a sensory channel that is difficult for them to use. This channel might not be used regularly or at all, and therefore it simply doesn’t work as well. I had an adult meditation student a few years ago, Charlie, who said he had tried to meditate unsuccessfully for years. During class, I led him through a meditation in which he was encouraged to feel what he was experiencing in addition to seeing and hearing it. Afterwards, Charlie was moved tremendously. He told the class he felt warmth in his chest when he was guided to move energy from the top of his head down to his tailbone. Charlie said he felt tingling in other areas of his body and then settled into a sense of clarity he had never experienced before. It became apparent to him that his sense of inner feeling was alive and strong and that in fact he could meditate. Feeling through his meditations is a wonderful place for Charlie to start his practice. Eventually, his other inner senses will be rejuvenated with a little practice.
When we perceive our world fully through the mechanics of our senses during meditation or during waking life, our reality is as clear as our inner and outer senses are able to smell, hear, taste, see and feel it — and so we endeavor to do so fully. During meditation, expanding our senses heightens our meditation and our benefit from it. These senses that so many of us tend to neglect, relegate to “just” imagination or tune out all together, are essential to our meditation experience. So let us nurture our senses in ourselves and in our children — in order to enhance our meditative experience but to also improve our daily lives by having a fuller sensational experience at all times.
(Footnote 1)The Encyclopedia American International Edition, copyright 2001, Grolier Incorporated. Danbury, Connecticut. Volume 14, page 797.
